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Quotes from On the Fence

On the Fence

'On the Fence' - Season 1, Episode 2

Cory learns about the value of money and work when he agrees to paint Mr. Feeny's fence so he can afford to buy an expensive water gun. After Cory rushes the job and has to do it over, Alan teaches Cory another important lesson about the importance of staying a kid.

Air Date: October 1, 1993.

Quote from Mr. Feeny

Cory: I was thinking. Autumn's here and winter's just around the corner.
Mr. Feeny: That's typically the pattern.

Quote from Mr. Feeny

Cory: I think you'll like my paper. What a major freakoid that Ed Poe must have been.
Mr. Feeny: You have no idea how major a freakoid.

Quote from Alan

Alan: You had to have a house. Remember the apartment? Remember before the children? Before we were married? Before we knew each other? Remember how happy we were?
*Amy kicks Alan*
Alan: Remember when you know when I was kidding?

Quote from Cory

Alan: That's pretty steep, though. Maybe for Christmas.
Cory: Great, a water gun in December. I'll be the little boy spreading pneumonia.

Quote from Mr. Feeny

Cory: Well, for a fee I can hack off the rest of that dead stuff.
Mr. Feeny: You stay away from my roses!

Quote from Mr. Feeny

Cory: Cool. What's it pay?
Mr. Feeny: Oh, I could go as high as five.
Cory: Five dollars? Get a pulse! Five bucks to paint all those?
Mr. Feeny: Five dollars a piece, Mr. Matthews. That's five times two shutters, times eight windows.
Cory: Five times two, times eight. What's that, like $58?
Mr. Feeny: $58 it is. You are worth every inch of that C+ I gave you in math.
Cory: Thanks, Mr. Feeny. You won't regret it.
Mr. Feeny: Oh, I expect I shall.

Quote from Cory

Cory: Come on, Mr. Feeny, have some pity. I've been out of work for eleven years.

Quote from Eric

Cory: Eric, you know I'm thinking, now you're raking in the big bucks, maybe you'd like to consider this exciting investment opportunity.
Eric: Call my broker. Shearson-leave-me-alone.

Quote from Eric

Cory: Mom and Dad let you buy that?
Eric: Yeah, they said it's my money and I can buy whatever I want. Except that Buns of Steel video.

Quote from Eric

Eric: Eerie how she always knows, huh?
Cory: What, do all women have antennas hidden somewhere on their bodies?
Eric: I don't know. None of them will let me look.

Quote from Alan

Cory: Hey dad, how about some quality time with your son?
Alan: I can't. I'm spending some quality time with your toilet.

Quote from Alan

Cory: Isn't it my responsibility to finish painting the fence?
Alan: I think your first responsibility is to stay eleven years old as long as you can.

Quote from Mr. Feeny

Mr. Feeny: Well, Mr. Matthews, I must confess I'm pleasantly surprised. Your first foray into the workforce was a rousing success. You completed your task ahead of schedule and with a modicum of skill.
Cory: Cool, does that mean you're giving me bonus?
Mr. Feeny: Get a pulse.

Quote from Amy

Cory: Hi, mom. Wow, dinner smells terrific and that thing you're wearing is lovely. What is that? A dress?
Amy: Oh, Cory, what a lovely and sincere compliment. And I just know you wouldn't spoil it by asking me for something

Quote from Alan

Cory: I want to be able to afford stuff.
Alan: So do I!

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