<< Previous Episode Next Episode >>

Quotes from Girl Meets Mr. Squirrels

Girl Meets Mr. Squirrels

'Girl Meets Mr. Squirrels' - Season 2, Episode 5

After Riley and Maya get into an argument, Cory calls in help from a specially trained mediator in the form of brother Eric and his alter ego, Plays with Squirrels.

Air Date: May 15, 2015.

Quote from Eric

Topanga: I owe you an apology, Eric. People who underestimate you are making a big mistake. Cory was right to have faith in you. You really are a mature, normal human being.
Eric: I am not!

Quote from Eric

Eric: Now, which one of you is Riley's friend Moesha?

Quote from Lucas

Lucas: Hey, you think this is easy? You think it's easy being me every day?
Everybody: Shut up.
Lucas: Yeah, okay.

Quote from Eric

Cory: This is my brother Eric and there's no one I trust more in the art of mediation.
Eric: Mediation. Sitting cross-legged going Ohmmm, Ohmm, my legs are killing me.

Quote from Farkle

Farkle: How could she disagree with him? He's right.
Maya: You're next.
Farkle: I wanna be first.

Quote from Farkle

Farkle: You know, if you let me mess you up a little bit, I think you'd be a lot more relatable to people.
Lucas: Okay, go ahead.
Okay?
Farkle: How did that make you better?

Quote from Farkle

Lucas: I'm a freak?
Farkle: Look at you! Look at your freak face and your freak hair. You make me sick!

Quote from Farkle

Farkle: You know, I've never admitted this before, but sometimes I wonder if my desire for world domination actually comes from deep down feeling like I'm Squeaky the Mouse.
Lucas: What makes you feel like that?
Farkle: You do.
Lucas: How?
Farkle: Just by being alive, you freak.

Quote from Maya

Maya: Hey! Nobody laughs at her but me.

Quote from Maya

Lucas: She called me Huckleberry.
Maya: There's also the possibility I may have called him Ranger Rick once.
Lucas: Once?
Maya: Oh, yeah, Ranger Roy once. Ranger Rick is every day.
Lucas: Don't forget about Bucky McBoingBoing.
Maya: Oh, that was a fun day.

Quote from Cory

Cory: Okay, to avoid something like that, the next step would be to bring in a mediating body like the United Nations. But unfortunately they said no, so I've decided to bring in a respected intellect from the North.

Quote from Eric

Eric: I need you to tell us what this fight is about so I can fix it.
Maya: Lucas called me short.
Cory: Fix it.
Eric: Yeah, I can't fix that.

Quote from Eric

Eric: Anyhoo, I have been summoned. Why have I been brought to here?
Topanga: Because Cory thinks when it comes to helping people, you somehow turn into a genius.
Riley: I'm in a fight with my best friend.
Eric: There will be no losing friends. Lose one friend. Lose all friends. Lose yourself.

Quote from Eric

Topanga: It's Quebec.
Eric: The Jeopardy guy?
Topanga: No.
Eric: Who is the Jeopardy guy?

Quote from Eric

Riley: And you're the mayor of St. Upid town?
Eric: Yes, I was elected in a landslide. See, after the landslide, everybody that wasn't killed voted for me.

Quote from Maya

Riley: I will not stink up the integrity of our bay window with this ridiculous argument.
Maya: You come here and stink it up, right now.

Quote from Topanga

Topanga: Honey, remember about your Uncle Eric, same rules we told you at the zoo. Don't stand too close. Don't feed him. And whatever you do, do not call him Koko.

Quote from Topanga

Maya: That's easy for you to say. Everybody looks up to you because you're this brilliant, strong, Amazon warrior.
Topanga: Oh, really?
Maya: Wow, you're a shrimp.
Topanga: Yeah.
Maya: You always been like this?
Topanga: Yeah.
Maya: You're not just doing this for me?
Topanga: No, Maya. This is me.
Maya: But you're the fiercest woman I know.
Topanga: And so are you. A couple of short stacks of pancakes like us can do just fine.

Quote from Topanga

Cory: Riley!
Topanga: Why'd you blow the whistle?
Riley: Caveman!
Topanga: Honey, it's not a caveman. It's your uncle Eric. Okay, it's a caveman.

Quote from Cory

Farkle: You really know how to talk to people. Have you ever thought about taking over the world?
Eric: The world you say?
Cory: Fortunately the world has protective mechanisms in place that would never allow that to happen.
Eric: Yes, fortunately.

Zay: Is that why it hurts to sit?

Zay: Seriously, does it not hurt anyone else to sit?

Quote from Riley

Riley: Do you think I'm a super klutz?
Maya: Yeah. Do you think I'm super short?
Riley: I think you're regular short.

Quote from Eric

Eric: Why doesn't it matter?
Maya: Because we're best friends.
Eric: I can't hear you.
Maya: Because we're best friends!
Eric: I still can't hear you.
Something's wrong!

Quote from Cory

Eric: You may be wondering why I'm-
Cory: Not now.

Quote from Eric

Maya: I don't think I'm gonna grow any more.
Eric: I might be done, too.

Quote from Eric

Eric: When I finally hear what this argument is about and I fix it all up in like one second. Okay? Yep.
Okay, Malala, come here.

Quote from Eric

Eric: Yeah, okay, you know what no one can argue with there, Tomato?

Quote from Eric

Eric: Listen, Riley. Look, in Margie's point of view, right and wrong don't matter.

Quote from Eric

Eric: Thank you, Tuba.

Quote from Eric

Eric: I don't have to look like this.
Everybody look at me.
*Pulls wig and beard off*
OW!

Quote from Eric

Eric: You have a stupid name.

Quote from Eric

Eric: It's a lovely little village right on the border of New York and France.
Riley: New York doesn't even border France. It borders Canada.
Eric: Well then why do they speak French? Why don't they speak Canyadahoo?

Quote from Eric

Auggie: Uncle Eric, why do you look like that?
Cory: Because they elected him mayor.
Riley: Who would do that?
Topanga: The good people of Stupid Town.
Eric: It's not pronounced Stupid Town.
Topanga: How is it pronounced?
Eric: St. Upid Town.

Quote from Eric

Eric: I have been summoned.

Quote from Cory

Cory: In college, all my friends had a war, and it was great. Until it wasn't.

Quote from Eric

Eric: Hello, niche.
Riley: Uncle Eric.
Eric: Little Pangers.

Quote from Eric

Topanga: Hey, Eric.
Eric: Pangers! You're still here.
Topanga: Yeah.

Quote from Topanga

Topanga: Oh, how St. Upid of me.

Zay: One dollar to look at the freak.
Lucas: Oh, be quiet, flat butt.
Zay: What? Really? I had no idea.

Quote from Eric

Eric: Okay, you know what, fine. Stay a hobbit.

Quote from Topanga

Topanga: Yo, bozo.
Eric: Yes.

Quote from Eric

Riley: I just can't side with her this time. This time, we just can't go into Candycane world and can't just go skipping over the rainbow bridge with our underwear on our heads.
Eric: Yeah, I'm not doing that again.

Quote from Cory

Cory: Sorry, guys, but I think this is gonna take someone a little better at this than us. This is gonna take someone with a very unique set of skills. This is gonna take-

Quote from Eric

Eric: Ah, you missed the whole parade.

Quote from Eric

Maya: I've got to say you did really well for us.
Eric: Thank you, Mordecai.

Quote from Topanga

Topanga: And Eric's really good at this because you wanna believe everybody has to be good at something.

Quote from Topanga

Topanga: I'm sorry, are you explaining something to me?

<< Previous Episode Next Episode >>