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Quotes from Girl Meets Mr. Squirrels Goes to Washington

Girl Meets Mr. Squirrels Goes to Washington

'Girl Meets Mr. Squirrels Goes to Washington' - Season 2, Episode 9

Eric is unexpectedly recruited to run for the Senate, but it becomes clear the incumbent senator had Eric drafted in to make himself look better. After Eric asks the kids to run his campaign, Riley and her friends rally around to help get him elected. Meanwhile, Eric is also helped by somebody from his past.

Air Date: July 10, 2015.

Quote from Maya

Cory: Current events. Someone tell me what's going on in the world.
Maya: Stuff happened in some country. Some team won a game. And it's cold somewhere with a chance of I don't care. Am I all caught up?

Quote from Eric

Eric: You're right. I don't have the experience you have. But you've been doing this for a very long time, Senator, and we don't see anything getting better. And no, I don't have kids yet. But I care about them very much.
Senator Graham: But you can't prove it.
TJ: But I can.
Senator Graham: Excuse me?
TJ: My name is TJ Murphy. Thomas Jonathan Murphy. Eric Matthews once knew me as-
Eric: Tommy!

Quote from Maya

Maya: Eric, it's Moesha. We need you.

TJ: The best thing Eric ever did for me was one of the hardest decisions he had to make. He gave me up. To a wonderful family that raised me. But I have never forgotten what I learned from Eric, either. Kindness, honesty, and more respect for human beings than I've ever know anyone else to have.
Eric Matthews sacrificed himself for the future of a child.
You sacrificed the future of children for yourself, Senator.

Quote from Farkle

Farkle: We need to treat this planet better. I don't want to go to Mars. I want to rule an earth that has good air and good water. A good Earth for your children.
Riley: Our children?
Maya: Our children?
Farkle: I want eleven. Split them up however you want.
Riley: How do you want-
Maya: You get eleven.

Quote from Eric

Eric: You know, they set us up to lose, Maya.
Maya: You know my name?
Eric: Of course I know your name. I like you very much.

Quote from Eric

Eric: Wow! Ha-ha. This looks just like Harley Keiner.
Oh, Harley Keiner. Mmm, Harley Keiner.
If I could do my whole life over again, I would give that guy such a what for.
You do. You do look a lot like Harley Keiner.
You got like the whole Harley Keiner head and the whole Harley Keiner face.
It says Harley on your shirt.
Oh, this is terrible.

Quote from Farkle

Eric: Are you a robot?
Farkle: I'm a real boy!
Cory: Birth certificate?
Farkle: Still looking.

Quote from Cory

Riley: Guys, did you hear? Eric could win. He could be one of our country's leaders.
Cory: Yeah. We know.
Riley: So where you going?
Topanga: Far-
Cory: -far, far away.
Topanga: As far as we can go. Good luck to you.
Cory: Bye.

Quote from Lucas

Cory: Well, that's a shame guys, because this world's gonna belong to you soon.
Maya: Uh, the one you messed up?
Lucas: Yeah, thanks anyway.

Quote from Maya

Maya: Well, maybe we don't have a vote, Lucas -
Lucas: Did you just call me Lucas?
Maya: I've always known your name. I like us all very much.

Quote from Farkle

Farkle: Maybe we do have a voice.
Riley: So, what do you want to say, robot?
Farkle: You, me, Earth. Let's do this thing.

Quote from Eric

Eric: I'm done. I'm just going home.
I'm going to miss you scarecrow, lion, Dorothy, robot.
I think I'm gonna miss you most of all.

Harley Keiner: Okay, Matthews. You kiss nice. You got my vote.

Quote from Cory

Harley Keiner: What are you doing?
Eric: I'm supposed to.
Cory: Babies. You kiss babies, you maroon.

Quote from Eric

Eric: You guys! We don't need to be afraid. We can win this thing. We just need to remember the wise words of President F Dr. Oosevelt.

Quote from Eric

Riley: So he chose his own future over ours?
Maya: Beat the bad, bad man, Eric.
Eric: I'm gonna do my best, Moesha.

Quote from Cory

Cory: Everybody close your books. It's the end of the world.

Quote from Farkle

Farkle: When I read the news, it makes me feel like this isn't even a planet I'd want to rule.
Riley: Wow, Farkle, I've never heard you say anything like that before.
Farkle: I'm a visionary, Riley. I look ahead. You, me, Mars, let's do this thing.

Quote from Eric

Lucas: Eric, what's the first thing you're gonna do if you win?
Eric: I'm going to adopt Tommy.
TJ: You can't. But you could hire me. I'd like to keep being part of the campaign, if it's okay with you.
Eric: I was hoping you'd say that.

Eric: You grew up to be a really good person.
TJ: Yeah, I learned from some really good people.

Quote from Eric

Senator Graham: I'm sorry. Did you just say you have children? Because you don't actually have any children of your own, do you, Matthews?
Eric: No, I don't. I have a niche and her brother, who's my Cousin Auggie!

Cory: Okay, first question to Senator Graham. Please identify yourself.
Harley Keiner: Thank you. Harley Keiner, head custodian. I'm proud of my school and the environment I help create for my kids.
*round of applause*
Aw, really? Thank you, my kids.
My question is what are you going to do for the little guy?
Senator Graham: I have never believed there are little guys. I've always believed all voters are equal in stature.
Harley Keiner: I already don't believe you.

Quote from Eric

Eric: That's my niche.

Quote from Eric

Eric: They played me. I'm just supposed to lose.
TJ: Supposed to.
Riley: Like Kennedy was-
Maya: - to Nixon.
Eric: Yeah, but those guys weren't real!

Quote from Eric

Eric: Well, there's one. Now, how many do we need, robot?
Farkle: Three million.
Eric: And how many do we have, robot?
Farkle: One.
Eric: Now burn me with your laser eyes.
No, don't.
Okay, do it. Do it. Do it.
No, no. Let's not. Let's not. Okay, phew.
You know, we get along really well, don't we, robot?
Farkle: Yes. Because with you around, I feel really good about myself.

Quote from Eric

Riley: Uncle Eric is running for Senator. Can we count on your vote?
Harley Keiner: I don't know. What are you going to do for the little guy?
Eric: Never really though of you as a little guy, Harley.
You know something, I'm sure this school is really well taken care of.

Quote from Cory

Harley Keiner: Matthews. You mind if I stick around for this class?
Cory: Of course, Harley. You're interested in politics?
Harley Keiner: I'm interested in why school budgets are being cut. I'm interested in why they take away art, music.
Cory: Oh. You like music.
Harley Keiner: Without music, I'd do something.
Cory: I know, Harley. I know you would.

Eric: What's your deal, man with the ideas?
TJ: I believe in you. I'd like to help.

Farkle: How do you know so much about this?
TJ: I'm the one who caught him. I have a website called Thorn In Your Side. I'm the thorn.

Quote from Eric

TJ: It's a great idea. The senator took money from children and gave it to his rich friends.
Eric: Why would you do that, who are you?
TJ: Because his rich friends are the one that got him elected. I'm TJ. TJ Murphy.

Quote from Eric

Riley: So who has in the limousine?
Eric: The bow-tie man with the big glasses. He was a whisperer, right. He's one of these whisperers. He came up to me and he was like "ERIC, YOU ARE THE ONLY ONE THAT HAS A CHANCE TO SENATOR JEFFERSON DAVIS GRAHAM IN THE PRIMARY."
Cory: That's not a whisper, Eric.
Eric: I also don't know what a primary is!

Quote from Eric

Eric: I am running for senator of the grape state of New York and I need your votes!
Riley: Kids don't vote.
Eric: Then uh-oh.

Quote from Topanga

Cory: I don't know how he does it, but tell me you're not on his side.
Topanga: Not.

Quote from Eric

Eric: Welcome abroad, PK.

Quote from Eric

Cory: Eric, Davis Graham is a six term senator.
Topanga: Eric, you don't have enough money to run against him.
Eric: Eric, the bow-tie man said he would help me with that.

Quote from Eric

Eric: So they plucked me off the street and hustled me into a limousine like I was fancy.

Quote from Eric

Eric: I'm really dizzy. I've done this in every classroom.

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